Saturday, March 26, 2011

The Royal Throne

Last night I had another anxious dream that we were moving all our furniture into the house and everywhere I walked the floors were slanted, there were gaping holes in the ceiling, rotted and cracking walls were falling down... it was in bad shape. And on top of all of that, the movers had lost the bed that Mr. San Antonio built for us. I was very angry and I let them know.

My dream might make it sound like I am not quite ready to leave our apartment; however, I have a new enemy within our current abode that may trump the fire breathing dragon, the lack of air conditioning, and all the other things you've heard me whine about the last year. This new enemy is....

The royal throne.

Otherwise known as the toilet. I will spare you graphic details, but all I need to say is that it chooses when it decides to flush and when it decides not to flush. Mr. San Antonio insists it is a union toilet. Perhaps that is the proper explanation. But all I can see is the fact that any time Mr. SA presses down on the handle, the royal throne does exactly what it is supposed to do. Then when it is my turn, the toilet protests, spins around, but doesn't go down.

Mr. SA is now claiming that the royal throne only works for the king.

But hopefully, in about a month we'll be moving to our own castle, where we have the right to fire unionized toilets and other uncooperative appliances.

Wishing you speedy flushing,
The Pampered Bird

Friday, March 25, 2011

Teeth and a House

Today Mr. San Antonio is shaking his head and asking himself why oh why did he not become a periodontist?

If he had pursued this dental specialty then I would be buying him a new car with all my dental payments, and not the doctor who currently has a monopoly on my business.

On Tuesday I walked into an all too familiar office building and was greeted by the entire staff with comments like "Hey Marissa! It's good to see you! Do you remember me?"

Unfortunately I did, and I informed them that I wasn't all that excited to see them again. They laughed... sort of. Then I asked if my bone graft and tooth implant of 2005 had been the reason they were able to afford brand new waiting room furniture...

During the visit the doctor informed me that I need 9 gum grafts done over the next 3-5 years. He tried to reassure me by saying it wasn't my fault - it was genetics. But that wasn't very comforting after I realized I couldn't get my long ago ancestors to write a check for the mess they created in my genes. I might as well just go to the car lot and let him skip the middle man.

On top of the really exciting news mentioned above, Tuesday also brought with it the announcement that: We have a contract on a house! We're officially in the option period and if all goes well we'll close on May 1st! We are very excited about the home and appreciate the fact that it is next to an elementary school. However, my slight anxiety about impending school traffic played itself out in my dream last night...

I had driven over to the house to take another look before we closed, and as I was driving away there were hundreds of kids walking in the street and riding their bikes so that I could barely move my car without running them over. Kids were laying on the street, under my car, on top of my car, and laughing that I couldn't see them - while i nervously inched my car down the road.

A little dramatic? Mr. San Antonio said, "yes".

So, we're going into this weekend with a lot on our hearts, full laundry baskets, and a shortage of coffee. I'll let you know how we make it out.

Happy Friday!
The Pampered Bird

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

The worst meal ever

If ever you've thought to yourself, "Today I'd like to cook a meal that doesn't impress anyone. In fact, today I'd like to prepare something that makes the consumer want to leave my home and never take another bite of anything I've made." Well, if that's the case - then I have the meal for you!


In fact, I made it last night.

It didn't start out too bad. I thought asparagus soup, hand made chicken nuggets, and a cumin spiced coleslaw sounded refreshing on a nice spring day. I saw the menu in a cook book. The cook book has (so far) been pretty reliable. So I took out every pot and pan in the kitchen, assembled my new immersion blender, and went to work chopping and dipping and breading and stirring....

For all the work and all the dishes you'd have thought I'd made an award winning meal. But after a few bites, I looked up at Mr. San Antonio and said, "this is the worst meal I've ever made". And he very sweetly (yet with an unshakable assurance) said, "Yes, I agree."

Oh well.

I figure something good has to come out of the meal - and that is why I am warning you to never make what I made last night. I don't know if I left out ingredients, or didn't read the directions right, or if I just lost my head, but it was bad.

This morning as Mr. San Antonio and I packed our lunches for work, he pulled out the asparagus soup (which I really should have thrown out last night, but there was just so much of it that I didn't quite have the heart), and he said, "well, maybe we can salvage it by pouring in heavy cream and lots of cheese."

Isn't he the most wonderful, intelligent man?

I'll let you know how the cheese/cream therapy works out for us. And for the soup.

In the mean time... I'm going to look forward to being at work today and staring at the beautiful flowers Mr. San Antonio spontaneously had sent to my office yesterday.

Here's to wishing you an asparagus-soup-free day!
-The Pampered Bird

Monday, March 14, 2011

Thankful List

I wrote the following "thankful list" on Friday... but was only at home during sleeping hours this weekend and did not get around to posting it. I've also added an ammendment at the end.


10:30PM (Thursday) - Thankful for friends getting married and the joy of celebrating with them through girly parties.

6:20AM (Friday) - Thankful that Mr. San Antonio woke up and noticed that we had slept through the alarm, but that I still had 10 minutes before I had to leave for a meeting 30 minutes away.

6:30AM - Thankful for Mr. San Antonio and his lunch packing skills and his willingness to help me get out the door this morning in record speed.

8:30AM - Thankful for the free coffee that I was offered (after the meeting was over), and thankful that a miracle kept me awake and alert without it.

10:00AM - Thankful that I love my job, and am surrounded by a great group of co-workers.

12:30AM - Thankful for generous donors who care about education and make amazing surprise donations!

3:30PM - Thankful that my awesome co-workers went along with the idea of surprising our boss at the airport to congratulate him on the new donation!

5:45PM - Thankful for early dismissal fridays!

7:00PM - Thankful for friends and the ability to serve them by babysitting so they can have a date night.

10:00PM - Thankful to be back in my own bed (which I left too early this morning), and thankful that Saturday brings a new house hunt, a wedding, and more opportunities for thankfulness!

(Jump to Sunday) 2:00PM - Thankful that I survived our 5 mile run with the help of my personal trainer more commonly known as Mr. San Antonio. And even more thankful that Mr. SA helped me clean the apartment while I went to the grocery store - and now I have a sparkling white tub again!

Why oh why do things like sparkling white tubs make me feel so giddy inside?
Hope you have a day full of thankfulness,
The Pampered Bird

Monday, March 7, 2011

A (boring) house update

After deep contemplative thought, and an informal inspection done by two of our friends, we've decided to abandon the house we've been negotiating on for the last three weeks, and start this whole process over. I wouldn't hold your breath for us to make a decision any time soon though. Currently our options are a house with wild animal prints throughout the interior (I don't mean wallpaper, and rugs, I mean dirty/muddy prints from stray animals that have wandered inside); a house with a living room that fits an armchair (that's it - an armchair); or a house that backs up to a very industrial alley (where I'm convinced more wild animals... and perhaps wild humans, like to reside).

But we're optimistic. And anxious to get something by May when the heat waves hit and we'll have to bring a baby pool into our kitchen so I can cool off while cooking dinner.

Oh - side comment - I'd like to note for the public record that as I type this, a truck painted with a british flag just drove by our window. And when I say painted, I don't mean a bumper sticker size image, I mean from roof to floorboards. Ok, end side note.

Other than the house hunt, nothing too new is going on with us. I continue to eat oatmeal for breakfast and remain mute until I get my coffee. Is this information too mundane? Probably, yes.

Until later (or when I have an inconsequential update to give you on our life),
The Pampered Bird

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Banana Bread Bliss

I made banana bread on Sunday.


I wasn't entirely sure what the result would be. I mean, I tried to make it "healthy" by exchanging a quarter of the white flour for wheat flour. But substituting apple sauce for almost half of the butter. And by throwing three heaping handfuls of fresh blueberries into the batter.

But then, I went to measure out the sour cream and I only had half of what I needed. I stood there and wondered what I could use to substitute, and remembered I had heavy whipping cream...

And all "healthy" notions flew right out of my head. Heavy cream joined forces with apple sauce and completely overruled any nutritional value found in using wheat flour. The result? The most amazing banana bread I've ever made. Which can be proved by the fact that Mr. San Antonio requested today that I send him a "banana bread attachment" via email.

Why oh why has technology not expanded into that field yet?

Besides baking and consuming banana bread, we also went on a five mile run, attended a wedding, had some friends over for dinner, and taught Sunday School.

We did not however, clean the apartment, or do laundry, and at all costs we avoided refilling the toilet paper supply, which means that I have to make an emergency stop at the grocery store tonight to make sure we don't have a real emergency at home.

We also looked around at some more houses. Dreamt of granite counter tops, and weighed the pros and cons of buying a house with an already beautiful new kitchen but small living space, vs a house with a kitchen in basically the same condition as our current one but with bigger living space.

Such difficult and stress inducing decisions! It makes one want to avoid sweeping their floors...

And I'm already pretty good at that.

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